Monday, March 28, 2005

Urgent! This Just In!

Unnamed officials in an unnamed government agency don't deny the possibility that Burger King is owned and operated by Al-Queda forces! After multiple, undisclosed, yet not completely unsuccessful attempts at terrorism within the United States borders, a well financed Cell, located somewhere in the Wyoming area, has purchased the famous burger chain in a new course of evil; instead of Death From Above, it is now Death From Within.

Al-Queda's intestinal jihad will conquer America one heart attack at a time. Osama quoted as saying," push the Onion Rings."

New Burger King breakfast offering outdoes Whopper - Mar. 28, 2005

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