Tuesday, October 26, 2004

I got drugs!

That's right, ladies and gentleman, The ol' Three Sided Cube got a handful of drugs today. Whoo-hoo. What? Oh, I'm sorry, not fun drugs you want me to share with you. I got a little Paxil and a little Clonazepam.

I went to C4 this morning and met with the Psychiatrist, who seems pretty cool. The meeting was only supposed to be 30 minutes long (damn fund cutting!), but I think ours went for like an hour or so. I think the fellow-nutter scheduled behind me did show or something. I'm glad because 30 minutes is WAY too short of a time for an initial meeting with a Dr. in order to figure out how far gone one is and what type/amount of medication to start off on. But, hey, when I'm suckling off the teat of a free-ish clinic, I ain't complaining.

"Luckily" my condition is actually a touch, smidgen, dollop of a few different things (depression, agoraphobia, social phobia, general anxiety disorder, panic attacks) rather than one big pile of mental crappola; she thought maybe the treatment of the Depression and Anxiety would clear up a lot of the other problems.

That is, if I understand all this correctly.

One thing that sucks is the scheduling nightmare this is turning into. My work schedule is random, and the C4 Crew is only on a couple of days each. So, I have to a) hope work schedule coordinates naturally or b) hope to catch the new Assistant Store Manager in a good and giving mood to work some scheduling compromise because I'd rather rather they continue to think I am weird, not mental and seeking help. (okay, not sure where I am going with this paragraph, so we'll move on)

The other thing that has potential Suckage: the side effects. This medication, the stuff that is supposed to help with my anxiety, stomach sickness, panic attacks etc. can cause anxiety, stomach sickness, sweats, dizzyness, yawning and about thirty other unpleasantries. Like rubbing sand on your arm to get off the dirt (okay, not the best analogy, I told you my writing skills either have rigor mortise or have decomposed entirely).

I foresee much Pepto Bismol in my future. Isn't Pink the current Black anyway; my stomach shall be in fashion, I'll just need to swallow a Neighborhoodie and an 80's heavy metal T-shirt= total hipness.

I've been home about three hours now, and I haven't taken anything. For some unknown reason, I am hesitant/nervous about starting down this "road to recovery." Maybe for one thing, the Dr. so was so adamant about telling me NO BEER with meds. This bothers me only for the fact that I got a 30 pack for cheap on clearance at Jewel last night, and I hate to waste.

Gotta call momma, then get ready for work. Later.

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