Tuesday, February 14, 2006

(Happy) Valentine's Day Junk Mail

Happy Valentine's Day

Ironically, this popped up in my mailbox today. A sort of a slap-in-the-face for a single guy who hasn't used one of these bad boys in a long while, don't you think?. It isn't too often, though, one opens an unmarked box and laughs out loud (slightly bitterly) at one's mail.

Ah, well, Happy Valentine's Day. If any of you lovely ladies wish to experience some "shared pleasure," or just wants to teach an old dog(gystyle) new tricks, let me know as I am now available after 5 p.m. nearly everyday and always on Saturday. It's got Warm Sensations lubricant, for Fuck's Sake!


Adrian said...

I got a valentines card from my cable company. They must love me for the enormous amount of money I give them each month. To be honest I would rather have the condoms; at least you can have a posh wank. Is that a trans-Atlantic term? Do they have posh wanks in the USA?

C.P. said...

What are you like a gigalo now?! I told you who to hook up with but, like with hair product, my advice goes unused. You'd think you could at least pick someone up at The Ho!

Oh well, miss you and hope we can talk about porn soon. By the way, I have an "L Word" lip gloss that I've been meaning to give you, since you're such a big fan...you can be just like Shane but you'd really be a guy!

Mac said...

Posh Wank... I like the sound of that! Wouldn't that make your cable company your "whore"?

C.P.- I head your advice, but by different route. I called The Counselor, but she never called me back. Bah! She must not like Pro Boner work, er, I mean Bono.

Long Live Porn!

Sincerely, Mac: the Lesbian Trapped in a Male Body.

C.P. said...

Too bad you're not getting any pro boner work but glad you're finally accepting that you're a lesbian.

Now that you have your fancy job, I say you get smoking with smokin' and the two of you will be 'hittin' it' in no time at all! "You're both trapped in a bank, she's hot, you're hot - that's what people do..."

Good luck home wrecker!

Mac said...

C.P.- Hell, I came about the knowledge of being a Lesbian Trapped in a Male Body way back in the day, around 1988 or so.

Why don't you start sniffin' around The Counselor and see if she's looking for some Pro Boner cases. I rarely see her.

"Home Wrecker"?!?! Shite! She ain't got no legal partners in her "firm."

C.P. said...

The one I'm talking about you "hittin' it" with isn't the Counselor, it's your smokin' buddy, buddy. Dream girl.